Can I play with Jesus, too?

Lilly, my sweet 2 1/2 year old, is helping me to keep this grieving process very raw - and that's ok.  I know she misses her sister so much, but does not have the cognitive ability to express her feelings like an adult does.  Her routine was completely thrown off when Jim and I were in the hospital for over a week.  She met Madelyn when she was in the NICU hooked up to the monitors and not looking much like the baby dolls she plays with on a daily basis.  She only saw Madelyn 3 or 4 times when she was alive and then again at Madelyn's visitation.  I've told her so many times that Madelyn isn't coming home with us and that she is in heaven with Jesus.  She asked where heaven was so I told her it was in the clouds and that Madelyn was watching us and could hear us when we talk to her.  Today she brought me a children's bible which she has never done before and asked if the person on the front was baby Jesus.  I told her that Jesus was grown up now and read her a few stories.  When we were done she asked if Madelyn was with Jesus, and I obviously answered "yes".  Her response was "Can I play with Jesus, too?".

Even though it is difficult for me to try and explain that my baby is never coming back here, it is helpful to think of it in such elementary ways sometimes.  -- Madelyn is an angel in heaven with Jesus.  She is always with us.  We will see her again when we go to heaven. --